COUSINS,FRIENDS AND KINDRED SPIRITS by Renné Harrington Blocker

 

It has always been my belief that God or a higher spirit puts different people in our paths at different times of our life and for many different reasons. People are placed on our path to walk the road of life with us, sometimes for a short while, and sometimes for a lifetime.  Genealogy has heightened this belief for me.

 

I began to search for my family roots exactly three years ago. My husband gave me a laptop computer for Easter three years ago and with the computer, there was a disk for creating your family tree. This intrigued me as my father died at the age of forty-five and his entire family had also died in their forties.

I knew virtually nothing about my ancestors that shared the same surname and there wasn’t any living person to ask about my heritage.

 

My curiosity about my ancestors got the best of me and I ran a search on the web for genealogy websites. The very first thing I did was place a query on a genealogy website.  The only thing I knew about my grandparents were where they originally came from. I placed a query asking if anyone had any

information about my relatives and almost immediately I received an answer back that someone who was related to me had a complete family tree on my ancestors. “Wow, this genealogy thing is gonna be

really easy,” I thought to myself. Of course, all of you reading this are laughing to yourselves, as you know it wasn’t long before “SPLAT!” I ran into all of those proverbial brick walls.

 

I soon found out that the man that answered the query about my ancestors was a third cousin. We swapped family stories, phone numbers, and email as well as regular addresses. We promised to keep each other abreast of any and all developments in our mutual search for our family roots. It was almost like there was some type of magnetic force we had stumbled upon, because within eleven days another “cousin” answered my query. Oddly enough, this “cousin” lives only 20 miles from the third cousin I had

just encountered eleven days previously. Neither gentleman knew of one another’s existence. Within a very short period, the three of us joined forces in our search. We combined efforts and

swapped Bible pages, pictures, birth and death certificates and family stories. Both of my newfound “cousins” were in the military and we all were in awe when we found out that our 2nd great grand uncle was killed in battle during the Civil War. His body was never recovered and there was never even a marker to commemorate that he had served and died for his country. One of my proudest accomplishments is that I was able to get a Civil War marker placed next to his mother’s headstone. I

filled out an application with the Veteran’s Affairs and now the world can see that our relative was a Sergeant, served in the Civil War, and was killed in battled. One hundred and forty years after his death

he is now at peace.

 

In the three years I have been doing my research, my database has grown to nearly 1,300 relatives. I have had “cousins” from all over America come, stay at my home, and go to my county’s public library to

research their “line” with me. I have put branches of my husband’s family in touch with each other also.

The absolute best part of my “searching” is the friends I have “found.” I can honestly say that one of my

very best friends is the town Historian of the town most of my ancestors hail from. She not only connected me with my ancestors but she and I connected in a very special way. Somebody or some force definitely threw our lives together and enriched them for the better.

 

Through my researching, I have found generations of my family tree. I have been able to compile current lists of telephone numbers and addresses and email addresses. This summer over three hundred of us were able to attend a cousin’s wedding.  We are able to keep in contact with each other and attend family reunions. I have an extensive media database and try to update pictures so that each family member has a current picture next to their name in my database. I have email “group” lists, keep all branches of the family in touch with each other, and informed of the latest joys, births, and deaths.

Two weeks ago a first cousin of mine lost everything in a fire. Her greatest lose is the lose of the pictures of her parents and other deceased family members.  Thanks to everybody contributing their family pictures to my database, when my cousin is ready to move into a new home I will be able to recreate all of her family pictures that were lost in the fire.

 

I waited two and a half years to contact one of my first cousins to ask her for her family’s information for my database. The reason I waited so long is that she and I had lost contact with each other about twenty years ago and I just did not think that she would be interested in anything to do with our family history. I contacted her just six months ago and she has been a wealth of family stories and information that would have been lost forever had she not shared her memories with me. We came into each other’s lives just before family crises hit both of us. We have been there for each other every step of the way for

support in the last few months. I met her grown daughter for the first time four months ago and strangely

enough she and I have formed a strong bond and become inseparable.

 

One of my initial genealogy contacts was the second “cousin” that answered my query on the genealogy

board. Once our initial contact was made, we have been in contact on a daily basis. If we do not email each other back and forth at least three times a day, we will call each other long distance. We are both spooked by our relationship because there was an immediate connection as if we had known each other not only our whole lives but in other lifetimes as well. In three years, we have become best friends,

confidantes and kindred spirits. We have seen each other through illness, deaths, and disappointments and we will always be there for each other. The man that first answered my query has become closer to me than my brothers have. We are in constant contact and he spent a recent holiday weekend here at

my home. In the last few months, he and I have been able to collaborate and get back to the 1700’s on our main family line.

 

I believe that everything happens in life for a reason. My husband was meant to give me this computer with the family tree maker disk. I was meant to do my genealogy. I was destined to be my family’s

“STORYTELLER.” Although my family is not one of great wealth or importance, I was given the job

of weaving our family’s tapestry together. I have been able to bring comfort to a few people, I have been

able to bring families together, I have become the family’s peacemaker and been able to settle a 25 yr. old family feud. Genealogy has enriched my life and the lives of my family. We all now feel connected and have a real sense of “family” and our roots.