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Mary (Mae) Schmidtmeyer (b. August 30, 1883, d. February 22, 1965)
Mary (Mae) Schmidtmeyer (daughter of John Schmidtmeyer and Mary Skirta) was born August 30, 1883 in Bohemia, and died February 22, 1965 in White Plains, NY USA. She married John Frank Pirner on June 03, 1903 in Bronx, NY USA, son of John Pirner 1 and Emma Pokorny.
Notes for Mary (Mae) Schmidtmeyer:
Mary was born and raised Catholic until early teens after arriving in the US. Her mother got upset with the Priest at the Church they attended in the Bronx, NY and stopped coming. Mary then began attending an episcopal church and later stopped attending church altogether.
She was considered a very attractive young lady and was known for her sense of humor and fun-loving nature. She loved to dance, sing and play the piano and was always desired at parties. She had many suitors and one in particular that she was much attracted to, but when he proposed, her mother would not permit the match because she had an older sister Anna that was not yet married, and in Bohemia, as in many European families the younger should not marry before the older sister.
Unfortunately, Anna was not as outgoing as Mary and neither was she as attractive and ended up remaining at home with her mother and working as an accountant in an office.
Eventually Mary's mother decided that she should wed before she would be regarded as "an old maid". Mary had several proposals and when she indicated her preference, her mother, now head of the household since the father was dead, insisted she accept another that she felt had better prospects since he was a lithographer, a profession considered "skilled" in Europe whereas the one Mary favored was a shop clerk.
As a dutiful daughter, devoted to her Mother and who would never consider defying her, married John Frank Pirner. Especially after he made many plaintive pleas for her hand and finally threatened suicide if he could not have her. It would appear that for the first four or five years he was indeed an ardent husband, at least from some of the correspondance between them when she was away. But by the time they had been married five or six years, he exhibited a violent temper and became physically abusive to her although never to the two children, whom he adored. He had also had an affair with another woman which lasted for over a year. Finally, in 1911 after eight years of marriage he moved out and back with his own parents.
During that time, Mary found herself with a six year old and a four year old and very little income, since John gave her very little for support. At that time, divorce was something no woman respectable woman would even consider. Shamed by the fact that she had to accept assistannce from friends and family members in order to keep a roof over her family"s head and food on the table she negotiated a loan from family members and and did the one thing of which she had any knowledge . Working out of her home she opened a Florist Business. Her love of flowers and her determination and fortitude enabled her to succeed and grow.
Within a year after he left, John had a change of heart and begged to come back because he "missed the children" . He promised to be faithful and to control his temper. After much soul-searching Mary relented "for the children's sake". She did not want them "stigmatized" by not having a father in the home. But she knew in her heart that it would be a marriage "in name only, for appearance sake". From that time on, they kept separate bedrooms and the atmosphere within the house could only be described as "polite and civil".
She began losing her hearing shortly after her marriage as a result of an illness and was diagnosed as having nerve damage. Among family and friends it was felt that this played a major role in John's change of attitude toward her. As the deafness became more pronounced he appeared to be more embarrassed and family members went so far as to say he was "ashamed" of his "defective" wife. At the time of her death, not even hearing aids could help and she was forced to resort to reading lips. In the last few years she seemed to become paranoid about it. If anyone laughed or talked with someone where she could not read their lips she became convinced they were talking about or laughing at her. This resulted in many bitter outbursts towards family members, whom she accused of also being ashamed of her disability. She spent her last years living alone in a world of silence living only for her garden and the visits of her children.
She also believed that all notable events in her life occurred in the years that ended in odd numbers. She kept a record, recording any traumatic events of those years. Her list read as follows:
1903-Married John Pirner
1905-Had Violette (her daughter)
1907-Had Edward (her son)
1911-John left us
1921-Mother died
1923-Lost Cameo Pin
1925-Had operation
1927-Lost money and ring
1937-Anna (her sister) took sick (TB)
1939-Anna came to live with us so I could nurse her
1941-Anna died
1943-Lassie died (her beloved canine companion of many years
1945-John died
1947-Gordon (her son-in-law) died
1949-Zedney (half-brother) died
1951-Emma (half-sister) died
1955-Charlie (her "baby" brother)
1959-Laddie (2nd dog) died
1963-Jennie (half-sister) died
1965- MARY HERSELF DIED
More About Mary (Mae) Schmidtmeyer and John Frank Pirner:
Marriage: June 03, 1903, Bronx, NY USA.
Children of Mary (Mae) Schmidtmeyer and John Frank Pirner are:
- +Violette Mae Pirner, b. April 26, 1905, Bronx NY USA.
- +Edward John Pirner, b. 1907, d. 1998, Port Charlotte, Florida.

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